I’m not sure I even have the words to explain how much I LOVED The Dark Duet (Captive in the Dark and Seduced in the Dark). Both books are in my Favorites list and that’s one story I will never forget! Ok, ramblings aside, the author C.J Roberts posted this bonus scene on her Facebook page and I almost cried reading it; not because it’s emotional, just because i’ve missed Caleb and Livvie so freakin much!
I’m writing this because you begged. You know how I love the begging. In fact, you probably know too many things and know them far too well.
You should know upfront, I’m not the sort of person to leave all of my secrets out in the open. However, Livvie has explained to me that writing her version of our story helped her heal and I was fully committed to that endeavor. It was the very least I could do considering the fact I had been the one to cause her so much harm. This story doesn’t have quite the same aim for me, but nonetheless, here I am writing it.
Before I move on, a word about names. They were very important in Livvie’s books and its worth mentioning. Shakespeare asked, “What is in a name?” I can tell you – a whole hell of a lot.
Livvie is now named Sophia. She changed her name when she entered the witness protection program in the United States in exchange for her testimony against her kidnapper and rapist (that’s me).
However, you know her as Livvie and so I’ll continue to call her that for your benefit, but of course, that would beg the question: Who am I?
Am I Caleb?
Am I James?
I’ve often asked myself this very thing and always come up with a different answer. Perhaps the only answer that can be truthful is to say, “I am both.”
Caleb will always be a part of me, probably the largest part. I want to be James.
James is a 27 year-old from Oregon. He was raised by his mother and always wondered about his father. He grew up with respect for women, but also a need to display his masculinity to make up for his lack of a father. He went to college but took time off before grad school to go and see the world. He met Sophia at The Paseo de Colon and fell instantly in love.
James never met anyone named Livvie. He never hurt her.
We know that isn’t how it happened. We know the truth. So, for the purposes of this story you begged me to tell – I am Caleb.
I am the man who kidnapped Livvie. I am the man who held her in a dark room for weeks. I’m the one who tied her to a bedpost and beat her. I’m the one who nearly sold her into sexual slavery. But, most importantly, I am the man she loves.
She loves me. It’s quite sick, isn’t it?
Of course, there’s more to our story than can be surmised in a few short sentences, but I’m at a loss for justifying my behavior back then. I assume if you’re reading this, I don’t need to make those justifications. You’ve already made your own.
You’re reading this because you want to know about the rest of the story. You want to know what happened the night I met Livvie at The Paseo.
It didn’t happen exactly as Livvie said. She’s been very kind to me in the retelling of our story. The truth is far more…complicated.
Livvie would have you believe that we kissed and it was all that needed to be said.
I wish it had been so simple. The part about the kiss is true. She kissed me, after an entire year of no contact. An entire year after she killed for me and I repaid her by dropping her off at the Mexican border covered in blood. She kissed me and my head did swim. I can tell you unabashedly, it was probably the happiest I’d ever been before.
Then she slapped me. Hard. I think my head vibrated.
I remember holding my face together and thinking, “I’m going to jail now.”
“How could you?” Livvie asked. I could hear the pain in her voice and it gutted me.
I believed she’d moved on. She’d made a life and I’d come along one last time to fuck it up. It was the minute that would never end. In that single minute I replayed mine and Livvie’s time together in my mind and I berated myself for ever thinking she could forgive me for the things I’d done.
“I won’t run, Livvie. I’ll let them take me and you’ll never see me again.” I couldn’t meet her eyes. I’d been dreaming of her for so long, imagining her face smiling at me. I couldn’t bear seeing her disgust toward me. I didn’t want to remember her that way.
Slowly, the longest minute of my life ticked away. I couldn’t hear any sirens, there weren’t any men slamming me to the ground and putting me in handcuffs. Which was strange.
Check out the rest of the chapter here.